Beautiful- Eminem

10:17 pm
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"If I truly wanted to be cruel to someone, I would make that person fall in love with me. Then I would disown them and completely disappear into a sad silence. Love and mystery are my weapons of choice."

So tomorrow is Friday. I plan to do this thing I like to call " disinfestation"
In the dictionary, this is the activity of getting rid of vermin.
Vermin are any various types of insects, or pests, and even irritating persons.
And I do not mean "irritating" by a person's self, but the feeling alone.
The feeling of discomfort.
Bothersome, and painful feelings that do not go away.
I want to get rid of it.
Because even trying to rid you from my head isn't enough.
All of the little objects and reminders I have lingering around, it needs to go.
Tomorrow I am going to scrape away everything that brings even the tiniest faint thought of you.
All those texts, I will delete them.
That last can of Strawberry Lilikoi I've always saved, I'm going to chill it, and fucking enjoy every last sweet drop.
My whiteboard, will be clean, and reusable again.
And so much more I do not need to mention.

I've done this process before, and in the end I become very excited with myself-
its unbearable and I even start to cry, or laugh hysterically.
I am a mad scientist, don't you remember?


This whole thing, it's not me regretting anything at all.
I loved this experience, and I am thankful for it.
I've become mentally stronger.
Things are much clearer to me now, I don't get too lost in this "mysterious fog"
I am alert, witty, and careful now, I can almost see right though many,
Soon, things will be clear to you too, you are going to look at me in a way you've never seen me before, and you are going to feel awful.

I really do not know how long i'm going to be away, but if we ever cross paths,
I am not looking twice.
I have nothing left to say to you.

- Krystle
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11:43

I keep getting those quick dip like pains.
You know that funny feeling you get in your tummy when you're excited and happy?
This is the opposite of it.
You feel it at the base of your collar bone, or rather deep into your throat?
This bellowing feeling that slides up the back of your lower head, and goes away just as soon as you feel it.
Yeah, it's an odd unpleasant feeling.
I'm so angry at myself for forgetting to buy cookies at Wal-mart last night though, LOL
The empty package is just sitting here, along with a can of vienna sausage I keep in my room just in case I get hungry when i am too tired to get out of bed and make food.
Btw, I don't feel like correcting that run on sentence....
lololololol
Good night.
And no video tonight, sorry :/ I'm trying to head to bed early, I'll call you soon.<3
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1:20 am
Nevermind, I made a quick oneee! <3
Gonna call you naoooo!